The Confident Communicator - Overcome Being Blindsided

Let’s talk about one of the most rattling experiences for any communicator/leader:

You walk into a meeting feeling prepared…and then you get blindsided by criticism, questions, or assumptions no one shared with you beforehand.

It’s frustrating. It’s embarrassing. And it can knock your confidence for days if you let it (I often do).

Remember: 

- You can’t always control being blindsided.

- You can control how you reclaim your authority afterward.

Here's my advice: 

1. Respond, don’t react in the moment.

You don’t need the perfect answer immediately. It’s okay to say:

“That’s an important concern. I want to give you a clear, accurate response, so I’ll follow up with specifics after this meeting.”

This holds your ground without being defensive.

2. Clarify the gap privately.

Later, follow up with the person (or people) who blindsided you:

“Here’s what I understood about the situation…”

“Here’s the communication plan I followed…”

“Next time, I’d appreciate the chance to walk you through this beforehand.”

You’re not asking for permission. You’re setting expectations.

3. Document your decisions.

Confidence grows when your work is traceable. 

Keep a simple log of:

- What happened

- What you did and why

- Who was informed and when

- When your decisions are grounded in a clear process, isolated criticism doesn’t shake you as much.

4. Tell yourself a better story.

Being blindsided doesn’t mean you’re incompetent.

Often it means someone else skipped a step and you ended up holding the bag.

Reclaiming your authority starts with reclaiming the story you tell yourself.

You are allowed to say, “This isn’t how I expect to be treated,” and still stay professional and composed.